Pursuing Results – Loving Yourself. The Whole Package.


“I Love you!” I said ever so sweetly to my husband.

“No, you don’t,” was his response.

When I finally started breathing again he continued, “As long as you don’t love yourself, you can’t love me. But it’s ok! I will wait.”

To say this didn’t go over well would be the understatement of the day, but those words have stuck to me like glue for 18 years since they were said.

You see, as much as I didn’t want to hear it, it was exactly what was going on and I had no idea! I hated myself so much… So how could I truly love someone else?

The flip side of this also is scary. If I can’t even love me, how can I expect someone else to?

I will admit that it took YEARS to get to that point (of even liking myself), but I will never forget the day that I said “I love you,” and he smiled at me and said “Finally.”

I Hated My Body

It is hard. It is hard to look at ourselves, the decisions we have made, the cards that have been dealt to us and to see the good sometimes. I was at a point in my life where I was FURIOUS with my body for not taking better care of me, for ruining my life, for being a failure.

I Hated My Mind

I was LIVID at my mind. For not being smart enough, for being “broken,” for not protecting me more. I was even mad at my looks. Why could I not just be pretty like the other girls?

I always felt this gap between me and everyone around me and it made me feel so incredibly alone and unloveable.

A Challenge To Love

It was a friend one day who asked me why I hated my body so much. “Not the fat, not the looks, not any of that, but your actual body?

You treat it like it is separate from you. You hate it so much. What if you loved it? What if you embraced it? Thanked it for how hard it has worked for you instead of how much it hasn’t done?”

I was knocked on my butt for quite awhile on this one and it took a substantial amount of rumbling to realize she was right.

I needed to love me.

Not the perfect me that I thought others needed me to be.

Not the healthy me.

Not any of those things. I needed to love ALL of me. And this started a journey.

The Journey Towards Loving, ME!

I started to focus on all the little things about me that I had always “hated.”  The odd colored hair, my weight, my eyes that changed color.

My soft heart, my abruptness at times, my sadness, my pain from my past. The odd health issues that continued to haunt me.

The scars from surgeries. All of it. My quirks, my oddities, and everything in between, and I started to face them head on.

Yes, my body has caused me so much pain, but what if I flipped it? What if I thanked it instead for all that it has done for me?

I can’t imagine it has had an easy ride being in my world!! My heart, oh my heart that passionately loves everyone and is so vulnerable! Instead of allowing myself to be hard on myself, why not embrace that loving, vulnerable part of me and share it with my clients, my friends, my family and allow them to truly know me!

Will it cause hurt? For sure. But it will also allow for so much beauty that it will be completely worth it. And my crazy? Well good grief. That is just what makes me me. So love it or hate it; it is who I am and I am now completely okay with that.

Challenge To Loving Yourself

What parts of your life and self do you not love? Or even like? What in you world would change if you could actually just LOVE yourself?

Are you having a hard time accepting your quirks or “flaws?” Then face them, head on, and make those changes.

You are worthy of love, especially self love.

On my journey of self-healing and self-discovery, I learned to not only like myself but to also LOVE myself. All of me. And it has been an amazing ride.

Check out Tinybuddha who has a great post with  21 tips to loving yourself in action

What does loving yourself mean to you?

Is it taking the time to reflect on yourself, being kind to yourself or accepting those flaws?

Maybe it’s analyzing your habits, understanding the amazing ones you have as well as some that could be improved?

Whatever you need to fully LOVE yourself, it is worth the time and investment to figure this out.

There may be small tweaks you want to improve, but you can love you now for who you are, where you are and what you are.